Title: Finding Out
Author: IrishDachsie

Pairing: Grissom/Sara
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: The author does not own CSI. No profit is being made from this story.

She walked through the door of the lab to find him hunched over a microscope. She stood and watched him for a couple of seconds, smiling. She started walking towards him.

"Hey, Grissom!"

He didn’t answer her. He didn’t even show any indications that he had heard her. She was closer now.

"Hey, Grissom!"

He still didn’t move. She reached him and placed a hand on his shoulder. He jumped and quickly turned around.

"Damn it Sara, don’t sneak up on me like that!" He smiled at her. She loved his smile.

"I called your name a couple of times, didn’t you hear me?"

He shifted his gaze to the floor quickly. "No…I must’ve been concentrating too hard."

He looked back into her eyes. He knew that she didn’t believe him. He could see her lips moving, but could only hear the hum of the lab equipment. This startled him and he quickly began reading her lips. "Sara, of course I can hear you!"

"No, you didn’t." Her voice, though spoken in her normal tone, seemed to echo in the room.

He shook his head slightly and looked at her. She watched his eyes for his reaction to what she had just done. She watched the confusion fade, being replaced by embarrassment, then replaced by anger. No…not anger…fury.

"Grissom…"

He quickly interrupted her. "Sara…that was cruel!"

He tried to leave the lab, but she moved in front of him. "Grissom, I’m sorry."

He looked in her eyes and saw sincerity, but he was far too angry to talk to her right now. The only thing was…he wasn’t sure if he was angry because of the experiment she just performed on him or if he was angry because she finally knew.

"Get the hell out of my way Sara!" She moved slightly to her left and he stormed out of the lab.

Slamming the lab door, he walked right into Catherine. "Hey, Griss." He glared at her, she could see the anger boiling in him. "Griss, what’s wrong?"

"Not a damn thing!" He began walking away.

"Where are you going?" He turned to look at her. He was visibly shaken, but she didn’t know why.

"Home!"

And with that, he was gone.

Quietly she opened the lab door to find Sara sitting on a stool. "Sara?"

Sara looked up at her with red eyes. "Sara, what happened? Grissom looked furious and stormed out the door saying he was going home."

Sara closed her eyes for a second and took a deep breath. "I messed up Catherine…bad."

"What hap…"

Sara interrupted her. "I have to go talk to him. If you need me, page me." And with that, she ran from the lab and out to her car. Leaving behind a very confused and worried Catherine.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

He slammed the front door and threw his jacket on the chair. "Damn it!"

He had never been this upset with Sara before. He went to the cabinet and pulled out a bottle of Jack Daniel’s, quickly pouring himself a glass. "Well, I hope she thoroughly enjoyed herself. Hell, she’s probably back at the lab having one hell of a laugh with Nick over this."

While he had been fuming, he hadn’t heard the front door open.

"I didn’t enjoy it, and no one is having a laugh at your expense."

He jumped like he had been shot. "Jesus Christ Sara!" His eyes softened momentarily as he looked into her red, teary ones. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to apologize."

"For what? Your little joke on me?"

"Grissom…it wasn’t a joke. I never meant…" She looked into his eyes as her tears began to flow. "I never meant to hurt you."

"Who said you hurt me?" The glare was back in his eyes.

"You did…just not with words." She never broke her eye contact with him.

He shook his head and took a deep breath, trying to calm his nerves. She carefully walked to him and placed her hand on the side of his neck. "Eighty-five…you are pissed at me."

He lifted his glass up to take a drink. Her hand stopped him.

"Grissom…that’s not going to help you."

He looked into her concerned eyes. "It’s not you I’m pissed at Sara. It’s me."

"What?"

"I mean, yeah…your little experiment did hurt. But, I’m not mad at you. I’m mad because I should’ve told you, but I didn’t want you to find out."

"What…that you’re losing your hearing? Why not?"

"Because Sara…" He looked at her and his eyes softened more. "You don’t need this. This is my problem."

"Haven’t you learned anything Grissom?" He shifted his gaze from her. "Your problems do affect me." He looked back at her as she continued talking. "Hearing doesn’t help make a person. Listening does." With that, she took his hand and placed it over her heart. "What do you hear Grissom?"

He stood there for a second and then attempted to move his hand. "I don’t know."

She held his hand tighter against her chest. "No Grissom…listen." He felt her heart beating steadily underneath his hand, with a slight rise every few seconds. "Tell me what you hear."

He swallowed hard as he felt the pulsation of her heart. He shifted his weight nervously. "Love?"

She smiled. "It’s not a question Grissom."

He swallowed again and repeated in a soft voice. "It’s love."

"Do you hear anything else?"

He closed his eyes, letting the sensations of her pulse flood his brain. "Fear." He quickly opened his eyes, which were full of concern, and looked deep into hers…"You’re afraid of me?"

"No…listen closer." She was whispering now.

"Sara, I’m sure it’s fear."

"Fear of what, Grissom?" Her breathing was slowing under his touch. He closed his eyes in concentration.

He shook his head. "No, that can’t be…I’m reading too much into this now."

"I doubt it…tell me."

"Fear of losing me. Fear of being unloved by me."

He opened his eyes to see a single tear roll down her cheek. "Sara…"

She smiled and took two steps backwards, away from him. He took two steps forward, closing the gap. "Close your eyes, Sara."

She hesitated, but saw the warmth in his eyes. As she closed her eyes, he gently took her hand in his and placed it on his chest. "Now…you tell me."

Her voice trembled slightly. "Love?"

He leaned down and kissed her softly. "It’s not a question Sara."

Then he kissed her again, this time she returned his kiss.

He was shocked when she broke the kiss suddenly. He quickly opened his eyes to ask her what was wrong. He noticed her gaze and followed its path…only to find Catherine standing quietly in his doorway with a grin on her face.

"Cath…"

"Lover’s quarrel at work?" She was grinning broadly at the both of them.

"Um…no…it’s not like that. This just happened…" he looked at her, feeling his face begin to flush "…um…this was the first time."

She nodded. "Yeah, right Griss. You looked awfully comfortable for it to have been the first time." She watched as Sara shifted slightly away from Grissom, only to have his hand on her hip pull her back to him. It made her smile. "So, if this is the first time, you wanna tell me what the big blowup at work was all about?"

"Um…no…I don’t." He smiled at her. Catherine knew he was telling her the truth about him and Sara.

Suddenly a look of confusion swept across his face as he realized Catherine was speaking. He could hear something, but it was very muffled. He tilted his head to one side, hoping to catch what she was saying.

Quickly, he glanced at Sara. She read the question in his eyes and answered with hers. Grissom took a deep breath and closed his eyes. He couldn’t hear Catherine. It was happening again.

He slowly moved away from Sara and made his way to the couch, picking up his drink on the way. This concerned Catherine. She knew he drank wine to relax, he drank beer during a baseball game, and only drank liquor when he was extremely upset.

"Grissom?"

He didn’t look up at her, just took a swallow from his glass. His eyes were fixated on his tarantula habitat across the room.

She looked from him to Sara. "Sara? What’s going on?"

Sara simply shrugged her shoulders in that way that said ‘I know there’s a problem, but he hasn’t told me the specifics yet’.

His eyes turned towards Sara. She could see that the anger was gone now…and that fear had taken its place. Quickly, she went to him and sat down beside of him on the couch, gently placing her arm around him.

Catherine sat down in a chair across from them. "Griss?" He slowly turned his gaze towards Catherine. "Talk to us."

"I… I don’t really know where to start." His mouth was dry, making it difficult for him to talk. He looked at them both before continuing. "Sara…I didn’t want it to come out this way. I’m sorry for getting angry with you earlier, but you caught me off-guard."

"That’s the only way I can get anything out of you sometimes." She smiled at him and he slowly gave a smile in return.

"Well, there’s something I need to say to you. And then there’s something I need to say to both of you. But, it goes no further than this room for the time being."

Both women exchanged a look of confusion and concern. When he was sure that they had agreed with his last statement, he continued. Clearing his throat and taking in a deep breath, he looked at Sara. "You don’t have to say anything when I tell you this. In fact, I’d rather you think about it for awhile before you say anything, okay?"

She slowly nodded. "Okay…what is it?"

He looked at the floor between his feet for a couple of seconds before looking back to her. He swallowed hard and then with some difficulty, said "I love you Sara."

She searched his eyes as Catherine sat, open-mouthed. Sara found what she was looking for and smiled. She took his hand in hers and softly kissed his lips.

Catherine was finally able to speak. "Oh. My. God."

Sara and Grissom both smiled, but were too wrapped up in each other’s eyes at that point to say anything to her. Sara ran her fingers through his hair and whispered softly, "I love you too."

His smile widened as he took her face in his hands. He tenderly kissed her and then said, "Please don’t whisper, honey."

Her brown eyes shifted slightly and she looked down. "I’m sorry."

He lifted her face to bring her eyes to his. He smiled at her beauty. "It’s okay…it’s just that I want to hear you saying it…not read you saying it." He watched as her eyes lit up with love for him. He quickly kissed her lips again and then turned to Catherine. "This brings me to what I have to say to both of you."

Catherine was still in shock over the display of emotion she had just witnessed. "Griss…you’re going to have to wait a minute. I need a drink."

Grissom calmly handed Catherine a glass of wine and sat back down beside Sara. He gently rubbed Sara’s back as he waited for Catherine to give the okay to continue. She quickly finished her wine, looked at the both of them, and smiled. "Okay, I think I’m ready."

Grissom leaned forward a bit, placing his elbows on his knees. "Sara had already figured it out…well, part of it. That’s why I left work as angry as I did."

Catherine tried to hide her concern and fear, but did a lousy job of it.

"Cath…I’m okay. I’m just losing my hearing."

Again, Catherine’s mouth dropped open. "What?!"

Grissom looked at the ground and calmly said, "Otosclerosis."

"You’re going deaf?"

He tried to smile. "Progressively." He looked at Sara, who was now holding back her tears, and placed a protective arm around her. "Sara figured out that I was having trouble hearing sometimes, but she didn’t know why. So, she decided to perform an experiment on me. I didn’t take it too well, so I left work."

"What kind of experiment?"

She sat quietly as Sara explained what had happened. She understood why Grissom had been so angry, but she also understood why Sara went about it the way she did. If she had just asked Grissom, he would’ve denied it. Sometimes, you have to trip him up to get the information you need.

"Griss…you know that I’m happy for you and Sara…but you also know that you’re gonna have to be careful, right? I mean, if Ecklie catches wind of this…"

"It’s our asses…I know." His eyes lit up. "But, what Ecklie doesn’t know won’t hurt him."

~ End

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